Coco and BigM - The Beginning.

I still remember when my parents first brought him home. I was 1 1/2 years old. My parents weren't very rich, so when they bought me something, it would be from the "reduced" shelf. Sure enough, they brought me a monkey wearing a red dress, dark sunglasses and holding a strange looking banana. He took off his sunglasses, and I couldn't believe what I was gazing at. That monkey had the sexiest eyes I had ever seen. I quickly grabbed him out out my mom's hands "What are you going to call him Coco?" I looked under his dress and the first thing that came to mind was "Harryparatestes". The monkey looked down at his crotch and laughed. I guess he can understand baby talk. "Why don't you call him BigM for Big Monkey?" says mom. Oh how original!!! I'm surprised she didn't name me BigN for Big Newborn!!! Oh Monkey, you like BigM do ya??? Whatever, BigM it is. But this dress has got to go. You're a boy monkey BigM!!!

The thing that fascinated me the most about BigM was that he could actually hold a plastic banana on his own. What was even more fascinating is that the banana wasn't yellow like the bananas mom fed me, it was checkered in yellow and green...It was a PlaidBanana!!!! I wanted that PlaidBanana and BigM knew it. He was a smart monkey though. Whenever I walked near him, he'd stick Plaidbanana up his butt so that I wouldn't want to touch it, but little did he know that I liked to play with my own doodoo, so it didn't faze me whatsoever.

One day, I decided "This is It!!!" I took my diaper of for more freedom of movement and because it was full of crap. As I walked by BigM, he stuck Plaidbanana in his usual spot. I pulled his arm out, grabbed Plaidbanana and ran. I figured that if I ran fast enough and swerved enough times, that the little bastard would eventually let go of Plaidbanana...so off we went, I ran up the stairs, bouncing him from step to step, hoping he'd let go, but he didn't!!! He looked at me and said "Why The Long Face?" ARGGGGHHH!!!! I dragged him down the hall, swerving from side to side, bouncing him of the walls, jumped over our dog, Shaggy, who bit BigM's butt and wouldn't let go. That banana is as good as mine now!!! Here we are, Shaggy and I playing monkey tug of war and BigM screaming hysterically. Then for some strange reason, Shaggy let go. BigM and I were now tumbling back down the stairs, our lives flashing before our eyes, both still holding on to Plaidbanana for dear life. We both landed in a pile of laundry. I opened my eyes, got up, and found myself with my head sticking out of one of my dad's underwear legs with my left leg sticking out the other. Little did I know that a similar incident would happen later in life. I looked back and there was BigM hanging like a Dingleberry with his arm and Plaidbanana up my tush!!! I looked up the stairs and Shaggy was apologetically staring at us. "What was that all about Shag? "POO" is all he said. "From that day, I came to realize that Plaidbanana was BigM's for good.

As the years went by, BigM and I became inseparable. We went to the playground together, the Shopping Mall, took walks in the stroller and of course we were together at Daisy's, the babysitter.I liked Daisy a lot!!! My heart would just melt when she called me SUGAR..."What can I get cha SUGAR" or "Time for your bath SUGAR". I couldn't get enough of that. BigM hated going to the babysitters. He liked Daisy but couldn't fit in with the toys. Most of the toys called him names cause he didn't have a yellow banana like the other monkeys. He had a Plaidbanana. They wouldn't let poor BigM, join in any monkey games. His only friend was MoreM, a cute little monkey who always carried around a rack of lamb with her. "Nice rack!!" BigM told her when they first met. I think MoreM liked BigM for his Plaidbanana. "I just love your big banana BigM, it's kind of a turn on." "It's not only how big it is MoreM, it's also how well I use it." Needless to say, they became an item.

BigM and I also loved watching TV. Our favourite shows were Scooby Doo, Captain Kangaroo and The Mighty Hercules. In Scooby Doo, everyone loved Daphne, the so-called redheaded bombshell with the hot legs but I was hot for Velma. She had that somewhat seductive but definitely authoritative voice, a trait in a woman that I've always loved even as of today. BigM hated the show because when the villain got caught, he or she would always say "I would have gotten away with it, if not for these meddling kids!!!" I guess he had a point but I still loved the show.

I loved The Mighty Hercules, especially Newton's song..."I'm glad, I'm glad, to have, to have, a friend, a friend, like Hercules, like Hercules, Like Hercules." I had a few problems with the show though. First off, all the monsters had the same darn growl/scream, whether it was a 4 headed dinausourous-like monster, or a big fat rooster-like eagle. Secondly, when any of the monsters were running at Hercules to beat the crap out of him, they would originally succeed and throw him 30 feet away. Hercules always had the time to reach into his pocket, slip his magic ring on, lift his arm up in the air, flashes of lightning hitting the ring to give him superpowers, and be able to brace himself and destroy the oncoming beast before it got to him. He also seemed to be able to reach behind a tree, a bush or a rock and grab his trusted sword.

BigM's favourite show was The Monkees (go figure). That show drove me crazy. BigM would jump around and sing "Hey Hey we're the Monkees, And people say we monkey around, But we're too busy singing, To put anybody down". WOW, THAT WAS DEEP!!!! What can you possibly get out of this song???

Needless to say, BigM and I were as close of friends as friends could be. Later on, I'll give you more details on my teenage years with BigM.